that cheating *basket*

I’ve been debating this issue for a while now (ever since Coconut Girl blogged about affairs on the seawall and under the coconut tree)

There’s this one girl I went to College with. WE aren’t best friends or even good friends. We just know each other and would usually make small talk when we meet at the isles in Foodland doing our Sunday shopping.
I know her husband though. Quite WELL!!  And what a sleazy piece of *bleep* he is. The whole time they were together/dating/going out or whatever the heck you wanna call it, he’s been playing the poor girl. I know this because he tried his moves on me, BUT, major fail-didn't work. I was a very very good girl focused on school and the HOT Tongan boys-YUM!

Anyways, they're married and have 2 little girlies. About a handful of people know he still does his usual; even some of her good friends know and I’m surprised they haven’t even told her. (or maybe they have but she’s being in denial?) He’s so good at being a sleazy bastard too.

BUT, the good community friend that I am, I want to tell her. I just don’t think she deserves to be in the dark about it. Especially when I saw the sleazy bastard in his realm doing his thang about a couple of weeks ago while me and my ‘undercover lover’ were out on a date.

WE were coming out of Cheesecake and we saw a familiar face walking Waikiki St towards us. Yup!!!! It was him. He was holding hands with a young blonde who looks like a red lobster in a skimpy top and an even skimpier skirt that could hardly cover her behind. We weren’t even surprised. AT ALL!!!! But when he caught sight of us, he full on pushed the girl into the APPLE store before he sat down on the cement posted next to the sidewalk.

‘Undercover Lover’ stopped to talk to the asswipe and I was too busy peeking around in the APPLE store if I could see the chick that was just shoved in there. Yup, there she was looking around and sneaking a peek at us. Does she know he’s a married man? And what the heck is this guy thinking? Is he really comfortable that people won’t say anything to his wife? That I WON’T say anything to his wife. Gosh the schmuck just doesn’t care I think. Maybe I should tell his wife when I see her next on the frozen foods isle at Foodland??

What say you expert women of the blogsphere? Should I? Should I?

Comments

Coconut Girl said…
Hahaha...aoooo faikala! Joking aside, the best way to look at it is to put yourself in your friend's shoes. Would you WANT TO BE TOLD if your hubby was screwing around? Would it be more painful if you found out that your friends KNEW about your hubby's infidelities and never told you? I always think that if I don't tell my friend that her husband is playing around because I don't want her to get hurt and I don't want to meddle, that's really bs. My advice - tell her...and expect that there is a possibility she will be hostile in return, or in denial...but in the long run, she needs to know. Just don't do it while in the frozen food section :)
kuaback said…
but that's the thing CG..she's NOT really my friend..BUT, I really really reaaaalllly want to tell her. (the faikakala that I am)If it were me, I would expect my friends (or anyone who knows) to tell me if my hubby was screwing around (so I can chop his polos off).
Hhhmmm..im leaning towards telling her. And I know the bastard hubby will hate me for it and would probably give me a toungue lashing next time i see him (which will be a good op for me to bunch his lights out ...or NOT) but hey..don't go screwing around if you know you can't handle the jandal a ea??? hehehe
Sina Tupou said…
Should I? (she asks with a hand on the handle of front door waiting to run out...lol!) Se malo, KB!

Ok, serious Dr Phil advice time. Ask yourself this question: Are you telling her out of love? Not gooey feelings or being her BFF kind of love, but being genuinely concerned for her and her marriage. If so, then tell her, gently. Like Coco Girl said, it's possible you'll get hated on. If you're doing it just to get the Basket in trouble, then put it this way, I wouldn't do it for that reason.

Always happy to add to your confusion! :)

(And if any of you guys see that happen to me, tell me STRAIGHT AWAY OR ELSE. That's all)
Anonymous said…
Do Tell... She is not your friend, but knowing her a bit is something. From another married woman to another. Women do not deserve

Yeah, and definitely not the frozen food section....

The denial of course will be expected coz she thinks she is inlove with the devil..... but for the long run, and if anything happens - at least YOU KB can sit back and say - I did tell You so!!!!
Teine Samoa said…
I have to say I'm not really sure how you'd bring it up. You can't really start with a 'oh and by the way, I forgot to mention when you were just dating him but now you have 2 kids together I just thought you'd like to know...'. Plus as evidenced by his line backer defence he is obviously skilled at deception and denial! Not! But he'll probably deny it etc. Sounds like too much drama to me. Though I'd definitely want to know if it was me being cheated on, I have to be honest and say I'd only actually involve myself and tell if the girl was actually a friend.
kuaback said…
hhhmmmm...very good points ladies..

I wanted to tell her because I feel so sorry for her everytime I see her coz it always reminds me of what the basket is doing. And also, because I don't think she deserves it or deserve a basket like that coniving *bleep*. NO, she deserves better. She's such a nice woman. and the basket is so good at playing happy family with her and the little girlies when they're together.

But since me and her AREN'T REALLY friends??? hhhmmm...I mean if it were me, I don't care if you're my friend or NOT..you need to tell me if this happens to me. So maybe I WILL tell her. Ok, I'll sleep on it and then MAYBE, just MAYBE i'll tell her (if by next week and NO ONE ELSE DOES) gosh i sound like such a faikakala right now...wheeewwww
I wish you would enable ANONYMOUS comments J!

Been thinking abt this one. Heres my two sene. Most women who are in that situation, suspect that something is going on with their spouse. But they gently ignore it, esp if they dont get the in your face evidence that its happening. These same women however, are usually going to be grateful IN THE LONG RUN for that person who is strong enough/brave enough to tell them what they know. And really peeved off with all the people who knew and did nothing, said nothing. (I hate those people.)
If I was you, I suggest that you find a good time to casually tell her what you KNOW. Do you know he has raving sex with other people? No. Have you literally seen him get it on with another girl? No. ( at least i hope not) But you can ask her/tell her that you saw him holding hands etc with another chick and didnt feel right NOT telling her. Can even try mentioning it 'innocently'.
NetsG said…
If your motive is genuine concern for her emotional well being and you are able to find a way to tell her in a neutral setting then go with your gut feeling, so long as it's not out of disgust for the baskets actions because it's not about him, it's about her and how it affects her. No one likes bad news and it's always the bearer of such news who ultimately receives the wrath, so just be prepared. I know you say you know her to say hello in the shop, but there are varying degrees of knowing someone, because it can end up being the case of "How the hell do I start up this kind of conversation" Don't get me wrong, if I had a cheating husband I would hope to goodness someone would tell me. However, if it's from someone I don't know that well, I'd have to say it would be a very strange conversation, awkward and perhaps embarrassing for the recipient. those are a couple of thoughts, possibly nothing different to what others have already said and probably no help to you at all ;)
kuaback said…
lol @ Lani..unfortunately, I have seen him 'get' with someone (thank goodness i didn't see him getting it on with someone-YUCK)
'innocently'-i shall try

thanks for the words of wisdome Betty..you've given me an idea..maybe I should suggest to one of her friends, who is MY friend to tell her and see how that works out..
blah said…
Like mentioned by the other "faika's"..lol, if you're trying to tell her for her emotional being, tell her.....I would, or maybe tell one of her close friends, and they should tell her...I know you said they don't tell her (even tho they know), well maybe trick one of her "frens" in telling her...or threaten one that if they don't tell her you will, and then you will tell her that that "close" fren knew too...;).....magaia ga, ova le faikakala!

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