Friday Afternoon Thoughts

Yikes! This blog looks sad. Last post - Nov 2016!

 What the heck happened? - PLENTY actually! hehe

Other than the usual career and family balancing act, I’ve had to give myself pep talks as time went by so I don’t lose my mind in public, at work or in front of my children - well that last one is not true because I'm pretty sure I've lost it infront of my children more times than I can count this year choohooo

2017 started off with a Bang!

Work politics, world politics, Trump poliDICKs, politics in general, family adventures, family dramas, self-development, self pity, shit rugby performances and daily intake of Hokulani cupcakes ; you know, the usual.

I took on more responsibilities of coaching more people at work – helping them realize their potential and help set them on the right career path. At one point, I convinced myself that I would actually make a kick ass psychologist. Ha! inside joke

If you know me, you know I am not good with EMPATHY – if someone starts to cry in front of me, I get pissed. I wouldn’t know what to do. I’d get up and leave the room or I’d tell them to go cry it out, and come back when they’re ready to talk. 

2 weeks ago, I took some of my team out for dinner and while we were dining and relaxing and not talking about work, one girl said to me “Hey, can I give you some feedback?” aaahhhhh shieeeettt. As much as I wanted to say “NO, just enjoy the drinks no need for work talk!”, I put on the biggest smile and said “sure why not, let’s hear it”.

You know, a lot of people are afraid to work with you. Like - you intimidate them!

In my head "Lady what are you talking about? People like me--NO! People Love me. They love working with me. I collaborate, I encourage innovation, creativity, I take initiative, I'm very engaged and blardy hell I get the job done"

what came out of my mouth – “Can you please elaborate?” 

Yes my inner critic was disgusted with this girl.

But, like any good leader I said “Thank you so much for your feedback, I really do appreciate it!”

It got me thinking about a presentation I did a couple days earlier. The host of this gathering introduced me as “She is a force of nature ...blah blah blah"

After my team dinner - I went home and googled 'force of nature' - because it is totally normal to look things up when someone said something that leaves you in a place of confusion.

Force of Nature - Google Images

At the time - I thought his introduction was great..it pumped me up. After looking up force of nature on Google and these images popped up ---- hhhmmmm...not so sure it was a good reference.

So I've concluded that working with me is being in the eye of the storm. Like...move your ass the tsunami is coming! type thing

To me, this is just plain silly. Just because I'm passionate and have energy oozing out of my nose doesn't mean they should be intimidated by me. I have a strong personality but that shouldn't make me intimidating. It's not fair to categorize or put me in a box of intimidating things.

This is just an excuse and one of those things people make up to have something to talk about so they can ignore the issues that need attention..like who the blardy hell has time ? 

If I'm being honest, I does NOT bother me a whole lot that people are intimidated by me because here's the thing --- that is NOT my problem. If you're intimidated by someone, that's on YOU, not them. But in all seriousness, YOU shouldn't fear anyone or anything unless it's GOD! 

You shouldn't fear someone because you think they're better than you. 

NO NO NO

NO HUMAN, should think they are better than or less than ANY OTHER HUMAN BEING!

You should treat the janitor and the CEO the same - I agree with this statement 110%

Everyone is the same. Everyone is AWESOME. 

You are the same as everyone else. You are ENOUGH. You are WORTHY

As human beings, we bounce from being "better than" and "less than", all day, everyday!

You cannot be self-righteous and be curious at the same time. 

Bring yourself back to CENTER , back to your COMPASSIONATE CENTER, before you speak.

And I am writing in caps which means it is time for me to end this post right now. chooohooo

I matter, I am enough and so do you!